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Writing a Journal and My Blogging Intentions

Friday, November 21, 2014

I started writing a journal when I was in high school -- a diary to keep my thoughts and experiences. During those times, I was not oriented to the Internet nor even a mere computer or cell phone (trivia: I first touched a phone in 4th year high, was it a Nokia 3310?). Everything was laid-back then, and I relied to pen and paper to write.

I am not a very vocal person. As far as I have known myself, it's hard for me to speak up my thoughts and feelings easily. Even with my husband, when we fall into some argument, I take more courage to speak up and tell him what I need to tell him.

But make me write, and I'll tell you my soul.

Like one time, we had a terrible unsettled argument. When I faced him, I just couldn't bring a word out my mouth. So I wrote it out, and it was a very long letter. And he replied with writing as well. LOL. We were writing and exchanging letters even he's just in another room of the house. But it helped us through that tough time. Because of that, he knew what I really felt and thought.

So this must be the reason why I love journaling in the first place. Back in college, I wrote every day. And now, when I read what I wrote, I can just laugh about my experience.

Everything was all about a teen's struggles transitioning from the laid-back rural life to the crowded and busy city life. From the life of comfort and lax to the life of a college student who needs to budget her weekly allowance, cook for herself, do her own laundry and deal with a new culture.

Journaling was a way of coping to my stress before. I wrote in between chores, oh I wrote every time as if to keep my sanity!

The first journal notebook I had was a Jollibee planner given by my older sister. Then the next one was a cute notebook I got from a craft store, where I chronicled my life after college and the time I met Mark. But the second one was less detailed and inconsistent. I just wrote when I felt like it, and most times, it served not as a journal but as a planner.

Then came my interest in writing a journal online with LiveJournal, which did not go consistently as well. Then I discovered Blogger, and it's free and it made me happy. I was driven by my desire to write away my thoughts and to chronicle my new life as a mother living in the rural.

So there goes the birth of the then-titled The Rural Mom's Journal.

Grabbed from Fancy Girl Design Studio

So my life has been a journey with writing and journaling and blogging.

Now. After giving it a thought (at the back of my mind for some time), and perhaps, what I am actually doing these past few months, is that I am going to separate writing my journal and blogging.

I believe writing a journal is healthy for our mental well-being, and yes, there are really some things that we just can't let out to the whole world but needed to be vented out somehow. I also would want to take the path of intentional living and I think practicing the art of journal writing is one way to achieve that.

And about my blogging career (haha!). If my life would be lived more intentionally, then I could publish more posts that can help others. So blogging here would be less than a journal of a mom in the rural. But about something more than that.

Along the way, I will know and you will know. After all it's a journey, and let's take it one day at a time.

To the Imperfect and Unfashionable Mom -- You Are Enough

Monday, November 17, 2014

As a lover of baking and DIY, it's a habit for me to check on Pinterest. As a seafarer's wife, I mostly rely on Facebook to communicate with my husband and see him virtually. And as a mom, I usually read other parenting blogs or sites to learn about parenting and to check if what my experience as a mom is still within the normal boundary of parenting. :)

It seems that my world is surrounded by social media. And as time passes by that I live my life without the absence of social media and all the information therein, there's this nagging voice of insecurity that is creeping in my bones. Pardon the symbolism, but yes, it's indeed inside of me.

Diagnosing myself, this insecurity comes from getting influenced by the standard of "enough" brought about by the Internet.

Those perfectly baked and Pinterest worthy kitchen creations. The fashion style and wardrobe of model-type moms. The work-at-home lifestyle of another who seems to juggle everything in balance. What else?

Everything seems to be perfect in their lives and makes me wonder why I cannot do it like them.

The truth is...maybe they don't really have it all. Or, maybe they don't to it all, too.

And that, I, or we, shouldn't uphold our standard of being enough to the standard of what the Internet is showing us.

Perhaps, before taking a shot of that Pinterest worthy baked goodies took a lot of trials and mistakes before coming up with that perfect one. Or the fashionably dressed mom has someone style it for her. Or, the WAHM whom you admire the most has a housekeeper to rely on. I'm not sure. But the thing that is certain is:

It is their life. It is what they choose to share to us. It is not us. We have our own reality.

They can inspire us to be do better or be better than what we are now. Take it as that. But to change your perception about yourself that you are not enough because you cannot do a similar thing. That's just being hard on yourself (yes, to myself) and also an insult to your own individuality.

But really, sometimes, as human as we are, we are prone to falling into this kind of trap in this modern world. And one thing that can help us is to always remind ourselves of our worth.

So to every mom who feels the same way, this is for us:

To the imperfect and unfashionable mom, you are enough.

Celebrate your uniqueness of imperfection. Celebrate who you are because there is no one else the same as you.

You are created magnificently by the Creator, and you have your own unique purpose. Live with that.

Always strive to be better than yourself yesterday. But do it for yourself. Do it for your kids. Do it for your family. And not to what the Internet says.

Let go of perfection.

It is okay to fail in baking, bet everyone else does. It is alright when you failed to read the storybook to your son the other night, you two did have a tiring yet wonderful day with the relatives and that's a very acceptable excuse. It's definitely alright not to be trendy in terms of fashion too. It's just not your thing.

Take care of yourself. Be healthy.

Take time to connect with your inner being. Know what you really want. What you really need. What makes you happy. Where do you want to go. What is your purpose. What is your ultimate goal.

And never compare your life to anyone else's.

I'll leave it as it is.


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